Toxic
people ‘defy logic’. Some of them are unaware of their negative impact
on others and others derive pleasure in causing chaos and pushing others
to the edge. Because toxic people are so difficult to understand, it
generally makes it difficult to effectively deal with them.
Know Your Weakness
You
need to recognize what makes you weak and susceptible to the wiles of
toxic people. The moment you understand what it is about a toxic person
that affects you so much, it will immediately be easier to deal with the
problem. It also gives you an opportunity to work on yourself so no
other can get to you through that ‘route’ again.
Set Limits
Set
limits with people you consider as toxic and distance yourself from
them when necessary. Think of it this way: someone is smoking in front
of you and you move away from the second-hand smoke. You move away to
save yourself from health problems related to something you didn’t even
initiate. Setting limits can involve communicating with the person to
desist from provocative and toxic behaviours etc.
Emotionally Detach Yourself
Most
times the behaviours of toxic people go against reason. You should
understand that you can’t beat a toxic person at their own game, you’ll
get sucked in. You have to rise above it all, emotionally distance
yourself from the situation and remove yourself from their traps.
Approach interactions with toxic people like a ‘science project’ – deal
only with facts, logic and reason, keep emotions out of it.
Be Aware of Your Emotions
Emotionally
detaching yourself from a situation involves being aware of your
current emotional state. It involves ignoring whatever emotions you feel
about the situation and remaining logical enough to recognize the
current situation for what it actually is. If you feel you are losing
control of your emotions, step back from it all and give yourself a
break to buy yourself time to get a grip and find the best way to move
forward with the situation and person. At this point, depending on its
effect on you, you might decide that distancing yourself from the person
might be best.
Don’t Fixate
Stop
thinking of how troubling or difficult a person is. Fixating on how
crazy or toxic a person is can, in an interesting twist, turn you into
an equally toxic person. You should focus instead on how you are going
to effectively deal with and handle them. Focus on more on the actions
you are going to take to better yourself and circumstances. Focusing on
the solutions helps produce positive emotions that help to reduce your
initial stress.
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